If you have been to my neighborhood, or been around me, you know that craziness gravitates toward me. My latest tale of insanity just had to be blogged because hours later, I still can't believe this.
My local bank, which is conveniently located across the street from my apartment, is notorious for never being locked or secure. This often results in people asking for money after you've used the ATM or all kinds of characters seeking shelter from cold. I left my apartment on a sober Saturday just looking for a few bucks to have a beer with friends. I asked a friend, on our way out, if she would come with me because of above mentioned crazies and the fact that it was nearly midnight and I don't like banking alone after a certain hour as a result.
Upon entering the bank, my first sight was legs on the floor. I thought, "Oh great. Some wackadoo is passed out drunk on the floor." The legs rose and as we looked upon this transient's ass, we realized, "oh, that's not some collapsed drunk" but a tranny, laid out on a blanket with money scattered around her, taking pictures of herself in the reflective security mirror. She looked like a younger Dame Edna (from what I recall... the shock of this really made it difficult to absorb all those usual details one might notice) and was very friendly.
As I took my cash out, we made note of the Otis Redding song playing overhead (there might be crazies in there but they always make it a pleasant environment with music playing at any hour... and surprisingly good music for a bank). Said tranny then informed us that she loves to dance when she's in there. Had our senses been about us, we'd have taken full advantage of this. My friend loves trannies, and who doesn't really? They're just some of the friendliest and funnest people out there.
We said our goodbyes and left but as we walked away and processed what the FUCK just happened, immediate remorse faced us for not having taken full advantage of that. Why didn't we talk more? Why didn't we go so far as to get a picture with this fabulous mess? Why didn't we check if this was a pre or post op tranny? I mean, we did get a good view of her tush, but who knew to think of these things?
That being said... I will never walk into my bank again without thinking of the tranny who got away. I hope her pictures came out fabulously and that the puzzled looking Asian man who walked in after us took mercy on her. You just can't make this shit up.
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