Where have all the classy men gone?

A song for the ladies...

In a city of 8 million plus, dating is no easy feat. When about half of those are drunk men at bars, it's even worse. Is your future husband/boyfriend lurking at a bar? Most likely not.

My message to you, single lady friends especially, is do not give up hope.

Men are pigs. Women are too. After a few encounters tonight, what I really am asking myself is not "what's wrong with me?" (which used to be a frequently asked question after a booze fueled night out) but "where have all the classy men gone?". It is NOT ok for men to try and pick you up using lines like "I don't mean to offend you, but you look like you give great head" or "girl that smile is so adorable you've got me sprung like a slinky"*. What is definitely unacceptable is men who resort to personal insults when it's clear you do not want to have sexual relations with them (I'd call it what it is, effing, but I'm trying to keep it classy myself, if only for this one post). Men, as I've learned, seem to have an even harder time when a women basically tells them, in so many words, you are not for me. Let's grow up, shall we? You're drunk. You're obviously not Mr. Personality with your approach (in said cases), and well... apparently contrary to what most of these men seem to think, you're not hot or cute or attractive to me at all. Not everything is to be treated like a sport. Women are very forgiving of many things that men are not. It's not just about a look, it's about a personality, and if you don't have it, the looks just deteriorate from there.

How about you guys learn to handle rejection instead of throwing a tantrum? Yes, no one likes to be rejected, some just handle it better than others, but it is NEVER ok to resort to two major insults just to get back at a woman - those being sexuality and weight. Frankly, calling a girl a slut because she won't get with you is just not valid. If we were sluts, we'd be getting it on with you even though you're a total degenerate piece of trash who has no concept of how to approach a lady. As far as weight insults go, it's a cheap shot. Women of all sizes and shapes do NOT like this. And men know it. While I never expect a man to just walk away, is there no better way for you all to handle this? Two seconds ago you were hitting on me... now I'm a fat skank? Maybe that flies with some women who are more insecure, but the fact of the matter is, no matter what you're like as a woman, you should never accept being called fat or a whore, or both. These are low blows and it is NEVER ok to believe that because some drunken idiot at a bar or on a sidewalk or wherever says this about you, it is true.

So where are the classy men? Silently observing somewhere as a minority in the dark corner of a bar, perhaps? At a coffee shop? On the bus or subway? Who knows. My message to all you ladies out there though is NEVER let someone call you these things. No matter what size or shape you are, there will always be some dim witted fool who feels so hurt that he can't even get laid by a [drunk] girl (who may or may not be drunk to score or just out to have fun with friends after a long week) that he will resort to calling you a whore or fat because he knows that this is where women get really hurt. It's classic button pushing. Are there classy men still out there? The kind of male who can at least insult you with wit and not about something petty but a character flaw, if anything?

The moral of this is, love yourself no matter what you look like, have good friends, and to quote Jersey Shore in a way they probably never thought they'd be quoted: "Do you and enjoy your life". When all is said and done, you will find a guy who appreciates this. He's just likely not going to be at your local watering hole. Remember that intelligence is sexy, not "6 inch heels on hot model girls" who still probably want nothing to do with said dude... or he wouldn't be on the street trying to pick you up.

Stay strong. Fight idiocy... and when someone asks you for a lighter, tell them no.

*these are things that have actually been said to me and I find them to be completely unsexy and in poor taste... and if you know me, you know there isn't much I find in poor taste.